Hope and Purpose, in God alone

"We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose."
~ Romans 8:28 ~

As I read in Romans Chapter 8... I find this particular verse struck me. Sometimes I don't understand things that are happening to me these days, but I certainly know that all things that happened, no matter good or bad, are under God's control. All I need to do is to love Him and be loved by Him. That's all. And St. Paul in his letter to the Romans put it very clearly that those who love God and who are called according to His purpose, somehow things that happen to them will patch up like a jigsaw puzzle which eventually turn out to be good. That is my understanding of the verse as I prayed on...

It is never easy to focus on Jesus when we're in darkness, but that is when He is nearest to us. That is when he is carrying us on His back (as per the Footprints story by an unknown author). In my darkest hours, He was there, quietly being by my side. Nobody is perfect, neither am I. I'm experiencing so much of "down the 'emo' lane" these few days, and I know all the tears I shed, He cups them with His palm. In these darkest times, the path in front of us may seem dim and unclear, or sometimes, even remain unseen to us... I read in Romans again that "in hope we were saved". It takes up a lot of patience for sure, but this hope in God brings new life. I shall continue trusting the God who saves me all the time, for I know all things work together for good for those who love God...

"For in hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what is seen? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience."
~ Romans 8:24-25 ~

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Yeah, I know, I should be burying my head continuously inside the deep pile of exam papers instead of being here. Yet, I am here to celebrate the achievement so far - I'm done with the fifth formers' papers... Now left with the non-SPM class...

Time to Praise God!!

I posted this entry in my personal blog (journal) and it is high time to ctrl-C the entry in order to glorify God's name, despite everything else...

November 22, 2009, Saturday (after Friday Life Nite)

Vision of Baby Presentation by Golden Angel

As we prayed for Felix and Yvonne Teo for their belated wedding anniversary just now, I saw this vision -- There was an angel, golden in colour, carrying a baby angel. The angel placed the baby onto Von Teo's arms and smiled. It reminded me of the Zaccharias and Elizabeth (cousin of Mary), parents of John the Baptist and how God promised that He would give them a son. At that moment, I had a strong feeling that Yvonne Teo will conceive with a child very soon and by this time of next year, there will be an addition to their current family.

A voice spoke to me in my mind, telling me not to tell anybody about the vision I had. In a year the vision will come true, then I can praise God for His goodness and His blessings upon this couple.

This vision seemed to be further affirmed by Von Teo when she said she felt like graduation from the school of marriage when we took photos with her bouquet of lilies. They are married for 3 years, seems timely for "further studies".

I shall be patient and wait until the day when the vision comes true. Then I shall praise God for His abundant blessings upon us all!

Thank You, Lord Jesus, for granting our prayers that stormed the heaven. Amen to the great I am!

Good or Bad Traditions?

It was an not-too-ok-but-managed-to-survive sort of day for me... Again, an episode of waking up just in time, missing the first part of morning reflection at school. It had been like that since last week, seemed to worsen by end of the week with the outbreak of not-so-joyous news from home, until now. I even made harsh remarks to a certain friend of mine after daily mass. Now, that's pretty bad. I'm just down-spirited for the time being. Dang!

Today, when I read the Word of God for the first time, it was a total haze to my mind - like as though all that was said didn't make sense. Then finally after several times, the Gospel reading finally made its sense... Thank God for His grace. I've nothing much to write recently, as though my mind is dry, my heart is in the desert zone. I badly need to be watered by God, so I guess keeping quiet becomes an art for me to learn now. I'll try to update blog, but apologies for nonsensical entries k. May things be normalised again soon~~~

Here's the reflection I got from OBOB for today's readings...

Tuesday, February 10, 2009, St. Scholastica

Genesis 1:20—2:4, Psalm 8, Mark 7:1-13
Link to Readings --> http://www.usccb.org/nab/021009.shtml

GOOD OR BAD TRADITIONS?

"That is the way you nullify God's word in favor of the traditions you have handed on." —Mark 7:13

The people of Jesus' time used mere human traditions to nullify God's word. We do the same today. For example, God's word calls us all to be one as Jesus and the Father are One (Jn 17:21). Yet we've remained divided in our denominations for hundreds of years. It's our tradition.

In the Bible, the Lord commands us: "Your thoughts should be wholly directed to all that is true, all that deserves respect, all that is honest, pure, admirable, decent, virtuous, or worthy of praise" (Phil 4:8). Yet we have a tradition of watching TV, which directs our thoughts to evil, lust, greed, violence, and selfishness. Jesus strongly forbids the slightest expression of impurity.

If we fall into the temptation to look lustfully at another, Jesus proposes that we gouge out our eyes (Mt 5:28-29). Yet we have a tradition of dressing suggestively and joking about sexual matters (see Eph 5:3-4).

In the Bible, the Lord repeatedly commands us to be "sober and watchful" (1 Pt 5:8; 1 Thes 5:6). However, we have a tradition of drinking alcohol. Some churches even have the tradition of selling alcohol, even when they are almost certain of furthering someone's alcoholism.

We must repent of nullifying God's word by observing our traditions, and we must obey the traditions which the Holy Spirit has given us (see 2 Thes 2:15).


Prayer: Father, bring down the strongholds of the evil one (2 Cor 10:4).

Promise: "God looked at everything He had made, and He found it very good." —Gn 1:31

Praise: St. Scholastica worked for God's kingdom from within the walls of her convent.

BONES

Have any of you ever seen "Bones" on TV? Sadly speaking, I've only watched the first season of Bones and I loved it so much that I'm re-watching it for the second time. Yeah, that's me, watching the dramas, animes, movies that I like for more than one time. One thing that struck me as I watched the episode was this thing called "social awkwardness" that this fictional Dr. Temperance Brennan has...

Then I stumbled upon a blog as I keyed in the phrase "social+awkwardness+define" in Google, and I find myself in awe of how many people in the world face this problem of social awkwardness. I have to admit that I am at many times "socially unacceptable" and face the problem of "social awkwardness" although I seem to be friendly, easy-going, all smiling and nice. Being socially awkward at times, I tend to react abnormally, comparing to other normal human beings. In fact, there's a word used to describe nerd... Geek. I probably am a geek at a level of humanity. LOL!

Today, I faced a situation which I became socially awkward and probably made a few new enemies. I was totally imprudent and rude and impolite and socially unacceptable. When I realized what I did was totally unacceptable to the norm of the society, it was way too late to salvage the situation, except a deepest regret and sincere apology. I was known to be a "faked person", a "hypocrite" to some people, no matter how true I was at that moment to the other person. So many times in life, I have a few friends, who care enough and remain patient despite abnormal outbursts of emotions. Thank God for that! Having said so, it didn't change the one fact - that I am still loved by God who created me to be me. Some of us might think I'm just deluding myself into believing that in a tiny part of the world, somebody still want to befriend me, but I truly believe and feel that God loves me enough to see pass this imprudent me and see the tiny little hope that I'm worth of His love for me.

I don't know what's going to happen to my life after this incident with my colleagues, but I know that God knows and He's my Comforter in the midst of loss and darkness. After all, the bible says that Jesus came not for the righteous but for the sinners (refer Matthew 8:13). This verse allows me this assurance that God still loves me though I've done such a thing so unacceptable socially.

Suddenly I thought of people who are socially unacceptable, who are shunned by many, sometimes including me, because what the person says or does cause people to feel annoyed, irritated and becomes irrational with thinking. I am one of them, but why am I doing things that people do unto me? It reminds me of Felix who serves with his wife in the young adults ministry I'm in... His humility is at this level that he receives and welcomes everybody in the ministry, even the "marginalized" because of their social awkwardness. Because of both him and his wife, I felt comforted when I was placed in a situation where I could no longer hang out or talk properly with the group of people I used to be with. Thanks a lot! Will I be able to emulate this humility which is being passed down to Christ? Will you?

"Can any of you by worrying add a single house to your span of life?"
~ Matthew 6:27 ~

Pray for Palestinians in Gaza Strip

I was watching news on NTV7 just now and the latest updates on the bombing in Gaza Strip was on. Please, my dear readers, please pray for ceasefire in Gaza Strip and peace of the world. People got too greedy with what we have until we fail to see the treasure of life given to us from God. Please, please, pray for the victims. Pray for a change of heart of the U.S. government so that they will use their veto power to stop the war instead of opposing peace in the world.

Thanks and God bless!!!

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
~ John 14:27 (NIV) ~

Renewed Spiritual Life?

This week is "week 1" of the school academic calendar, so my battle started already... I put it as battle because I could barely sleep every night, and had to wake up early every morning. Lessons were fine, but there are some hiccups regarding Religious Knowledge teaching material.

I wonder what is the whole purpose of teaching "Religious Knowledge" all about? Showing God to the students by reading the books describing about Him? Or guiding them to personally experience God and His mighty love? Leading them to form their spiritual life? Or just going through the motion because it is easier to do so and be perfect submissive to the rigidity of the so-called "un-renewed" style of Christianity?

I'm blessed with the opportunity to be involved in my early days of youth in youth ministry. Charismatic Renewal of the Catholic Churches began somewhere much earlier than the 90's when I started mingling with CCR people in church. Yet, it made a deep impression inside my heart, causing me to realize the our God wants us to be more intimate with Him, seeing Him as our confidante in fact. As I continue my journey of life, at this moment, indeed this becomes my first purpose in life, also my utmost struggle in life. Yet, to "install" this knowledge inside the head of teenagers is even tougher than earlier. We're basically battling with all the noises of the world to lead this group of people to hear God's tiny, gentle voice in their hearts.

It seemed like yesterday when somebody ever "installed" in my heart this important message: "You have to be M.A.D. in order to M.A.D." which read "you have to make a decision in order to make a difference". And truly so, when it comes to the process of renewal of this generation of young people, if I want to play a part in leading them nearer to God, I gotta make changes and differences in my own life. All that happened in 2008... it happened. Like my previous post, I can't deny there are times when I feel left out, alone without much support from my previous "gang"... But I also can't deny of His blessings, His grace, His mercy, most importantly, His love in my life.

Now back to the point, how can I be M.A.D. enough in order to M.A.D.? Submitting to the rigidity that's been proposed and continue this faith formation in such a "knowledgeable and theoretical" way doesn't seem to reach out to the youth who have the common problem of "seeing is believing". Instead, we seem to be pushing them further and further away from us. Maybe they could be shocked with the incredible amount of knowledge about God and His plan of salvation without knowing why He wants to do so for us... The answer is plain simple - just because He loves us... And all Christians (including Catholics) should be able to transfer this love of God through our everyday lives. Yet, are we doing so? Am I doing so? Are we transfering this love that we receive from God through our everyday lives to the people we're reaching out for? Am I doing the right thing making this stand to hope to see to some drastic changes in the faith formation of my students? Or should I just stay quiet and follow all the instructions laid down together with the text book used for faith formation, just because we have to submit? Is submission an "all the time" thingy?

I've seen the submission of Christ to the cross, the submission of Mary to the conception of Jesus by the Holy Spirit. So beautiful, so noble, so impossible for human beings apparently (reminder: Jesus was truly human, Mary was also truly human). Then again, I also see how Jesus made a difference in His Father's house. How much He made a difference all the time by laying His hands to heal the lepers on Sabbath day despite the facts that scribes and Pharisees were against it, the miracles He performed out of compassion for His people, to heal the blind, to take up that cross. I wonder how long did he ponder to make the decision to perform the miracle when He attended the wedding in Cana when His mom, Mary, asked of His help. That decision He made did make a big difference in the newly-wedded's lives, forever. Imagine if Jesus ran away out of fear instead of making that difference of casting out all fears arising in Him at that moment which He knew He was going to suffer terrible death... What would have happened to the world now? Probably God would have sent terrible flood and drowned all of us, and I won't be sitting in front of my curiously surviving laptop typing this entry.

There was a reading this week that has the phrase taken from 1 John 4:18 about "perfect love casts out all fears". When I reflected and looked upon the crucifix in St. Simon that day during evening mass, this was how I felt. I think Jesus willingly died on the cross because He knows of His Father, our God, so well that He knows the love of His Father was perfect love. This love of God casts out all His fears, anxieties, worries about dying on the terrible cross in order to redeem us from sins that we've committed. And His love for mankind, was also perfect love, which in turn strengthened Him at the cross. I guess, in order to be more and more like our Creator, to be more and more like the Man who saves me by dying on the cross, I have to strongly and firmly believe that this perfect love which I'm receiving all the time from God will cast out all fears in me and guide me in making the right decision.

So I guess, since the world seems to be oppressing me to make that decision to make a difference in the lives of my students, then what I'm doing is definitely what the world hates. Thus, I should continue believing in that tiny voice in me who reminded me about perseverance (that huge word I learned when I was in Form 2).

"You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that you should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain; that whatsoever you shall ask of the Father in My name, He may give it you. These things I command you, that you love one another. If the world hate you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love his own; but because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hates you."
~ John 15:16-19 ~

Thank and praise God. Amen!

Till then... Pax et bonum.

The Real World at Real Time

"Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the LORD."
~ Psalm 31:24 ~

I guess the phrase "do not be discouraged" is more appropriate for me at this moment. Something happened this morning that caused me to be late to school today. I arrived in school at 11.50 am. Another mistake made when I saw the principal... It was super late and I felt very bad missing class with my F5 students. I hope none of my students have my blog url, but I'd just like to apologize to all who were affected because of my absenteeism this morning. I guess I need to go for confession soon~~~

Yet, this phrase seems to comfort me. Knowing that God is still with me even I made a huge mistake here. As I searched for the verse online (wished my bible has such an index like a search engine at that moment), I was given so many verses on the keywords I used. In fact, another verse which helped to pacify my uncertain emotion is from the book of Tobit...

"Do not be afraid, my son, because we have become poor. You have great wealth if you fear God and flee from every sin and do what is good in the sight of the Lord your God."
~ Tobit 4:21 ~

For once, I really want to be the teacher God calls me to be at this moment. I don't know where He's going to lead me next, but if He's asking me to stay until further notice, He must have a plan that will prosper me, helping me to be who He's preparing me to be in future. I can only continue trusting in Him who created me in my mother's womb, cradle me when I'm in fear, hug me when I'm discouraged, love me when I feel unloved.

"I hereby command you: Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened or dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."
~ Joshua 1:9 ~

I pray that you who read my blog will not lose hope in this God who sometimes we think play a fool with our lives, because He does it right so that we can learn to be disciplined, well-behaved, loving children of His.

"Sanctify yourselves; for tomorrow the Lord will do wonders among you."
~ Joshua 3:5 ~

Time Flees, Love Stays

I wonder if I had a similar entry when I first started this blog... Well, this is just another of my ramblings before nesting in my dog nest. Anyway, tomorrow is Epiphany!!! Although it is the end of Christmas season, but it is the brand new start for us. Hence, this entry symbolizes a brand new start of the year... So MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY EPIPHANY!!!

Year 2008 brought me great joy, great sorrow. I wouldn't say I didn't receive the same amount of blessings as everybody did from God, but I would say this road had been a real tough one. I lost so much, gained as much too. This year (2009) is another year of the Lord. I don't know what lies ahead of me, but I know who holds all the tomorrows I have on His hand. Yups, beautiful Lord, wonderful Saviour. Sometimes it is hard to believe in His real presence, but at this moment there is no way I can doubt His presence in my life. Though great sorrow after great joy, I know the love that He brought to me will never change. People may not be able to understand what I had gone through or what I'm going through, but He knows me best. All that are happening is according to His will I hope.

I pray that you who read my entry at this moment will be blessed with a year of love, joy, hope and peace in the Lord, and that all that you do is according to God's holy will... The peace we receive in our hearts is the greatest treasure that one can keep within us. I pray that year 2009 will be a year to remember for us. Just like how year 2008 was. I know, time will pass, memories will be created, but this love that's been given to us from God, it will stay forever. And all I can do is to continue believing in Him, trusting that He will bring me to where He wants me to be, and to continue to grow deeper with Him. Amen.

What's The Secret to Happiness?

I got this from a friend via SMS long time ago...

I found the answer in my house.
The wall says be strong,
the ceiling says aim high,
the door says be open,
the window says learn to give and take,
the clock says time is gold,
the calendar says love everyday as if it were last,
the cabinet says keep in order,
the bed says take time to relax,
the lamp says be the light,
and GOD, who is found everywhere in my house says,
"KEEP THE FAITH BECAUSE I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS!"

I'm Back! =)

After two weeks of break from everything in KK, I'm back once again on 13th evening via Airasia. Surprisingly the flight was ok, nothing special except the announcement by the pilot somewhere an hour prior to landing woke me up from my neck-aching sleep! The outcome: Inability to sleep early after a huge supper at my favourite "mee bab*" shop in Lintas with Felix, Von Teo and Ah Boon. Smooth landing, I'd say - Thumbs up for the Captain!

So what have I been doing since 1 Dec 2008?

01/12/08

• Checked all my mails, clearing everything and packing in the morning.
• Had dinner with Mel in airport (thanks for the treat, gal!^__^)
  
• In the air for 2.25 hours and touched down safely around 11.30pm, went for supper with parents.

02/12/08

• Arrived home at 2 something in the morning. Introduction to Kiki and played with him for a moment. Realized he's not-so-chihuahua. (Update: I just checked online and 80% confirmed that he's a min pin/chi mix (miniature pinscher + chihuahua mix).
• Slept late and woke up to the sound of my aunty from Kuantan with her grandchildren (age 8, 10 and 14).

03/12/08

• Visited Batu Pahat (Including the Pantai Minyak Beku and Perigi Batu Pahat).
• Petted humongous "dragon fish" in some temple in BP.

04/12/08

• Visited organic farm (near entrance only) nearby my hometown.
• Went to Pontian to visit my uncle then headed to Kukup for a wonderful seafood meal after strolling on the tiny "roads" in between houses on water. Saw magrove swamp... and wonder why people just don't like to take good care of the ocean environment~

05/12/08

• Met up with my ex-classmate (form 1-6) who was to be married on 07/12/08 to get my invitation card. Had a chat with her and visited our ex-classmate's parents to enquire something. I was rather freaked out by the time we wanted to leave... but thank God everything was alright.
• Stayed at home at night... Just lazing around... and lots of GOOD FOOD!

06/12/08

• Met up with some form 6 ex-classmates at Heidi's to crap a while... Then left for Kluang Parade to lepak for about 45 minutes before sending everybody home and attended mass in St. Louis.
• Was rather panic when found out it was a BM Mass... Kinda weird because I rarely attend BM mass and it was once of those times when I didn't have my daily readings (The Light) with me... When I realized I do know some of the mass parts sung I was really happy... Thanks for my KBHK friends... :P
• Right after mass I went over to Bee Yean's house for a night of crapping and catching up with ex-classmates. One of them I didn't meet since 1999 after SPM (that was like 9 years ago)
• Arrived home with "white-attire" crisis because Byean wanted us to wear white attire in the morning of her wedding... Managed to solve the crisis, thanks for Mommy dear! :D
  

07/12/08

• Woke up about 6.30am... Practically dragged myself off the comfy tilam because I was totally exhausted the night before...
• Was ready and arrived at Byean's house about 7.30am. Had breakfast with bride and others...
• The groom and his team of "brothers" arrived at 9.50am (approx.), 20 mins later than the agreed time of 9.30am...
• We, the "sisters", had some fun before allowing the groom to enter the house, including the request of shouting "I love you" to Byean (she was at 1st floor), pole dancing, singing the 1st song he sang to her and some "tips" for us.
• Then we went over to groom's house, continued feasting and crapping. LOL!
• Evening came and we went for dinner reception... The food was great... Catching up was fun. I met one of my ex-classmate who shifted away after form 2. Wow! My age is catching up I guess!

08/12/08

• My aunty and her family left for Seremban after lunch. So left us at home with Kiki... Kinda bored but was acclimatizing fast with Kiki running everywhere at home. He's just too adorable!

08-11/12/08

• Life is good - just at home, waking up late, eating, watching tv, playing with puppy. I even bathed Kiki (without prior knowledge of bathing a puppy)!
• We even brought Kiki for a walk (I was holding him like a baby though) around my neighbourhood. Duhz! He trembles whenever he leaves his "comfort zone" lah!

12/12/08

• Finally decided to get out of my nutshell and meet up with Byean and Tyan Huey for a drink. I had so many types of food in a day... including super spicy thai tom yam, takoyaki, pau, fried kueh tiau, etc... Not forgetting the ice-cream in the morning!
• Tyan Huey brought her adorable baby daughter out with her when she met us up. She's so beautiful... just slightly loud... as babies are always! LOL! :D
• Arrived home in time to watch "The Little Nyonya" on Channel 8 (Mediacorp, SG) then continued on and on... LOL.
• Slept late again...

13/12/08

• Woke up late, still managed to give Kiki a bath before I bathed.
• Dickson came over at 3pm and off we went to airport. Arrived there about 4plus, had a drink and entered departure hall at 5.20pm.
• Everything went smoothly and touched down at 11plus.

14/12/08

• Woke up 10plus, washed bed sheets and blankets. Was informed by dance classmate of additional dance practice so decided to attend it, after informing my dance partner (thank God he said yes!).
• Had my most "challenging" two hours in dance school because of my poor memory on the steps (thank you, Samantha and Phoebe for revising with me and being so patient with me...)
  
• Went back for a shower and headed for mass in St. Simon, then to SHC for choir practice... Oh gosh! Christmas is coming... How would my Christmas be this year? Last year I spent it with a much-cherished companion and some other friends... I think we went to Bishop's Open House after Christmas morning mass. After that I forgot what we did, maybe just crapping at home... I pondered about that on my way back from SHC... I wonder why. Oh well, reconciliation will not come that easily because of the deep hurts we've inflicted on each other. At least for me at this moment, whatever said and done hurt me and I'm still recuperating from it. To him everything might come easily, cheerful and happy-go-lucky now... Haha! Good for him sincerely! Hope he still remembers our happy times instead of condemning me in his own ways because of ............................ Even if he doesn't, I can only wait for God's timing for His will to unfold. I just know His way is the best way... No explanation required on this statement. Just believe He'll make it right. Haha! I'm learning not to doubt... Seriously. I got serious warning during my quiet time on the mountain...
  
• Painted my nails with Elianto's Party Nail Color (Champagne Gold) after removing the "shimmering purple". For the first time in history I'm keeping long nails, painting them and having fun trying to type with long nails (got stuck in between keys a few times and kept having the accident of pressing caps lock when i pressed shift).
  

15/12/08

• Updating blog...
• Schedule including meeting up my principal in school, Dot Leong in her office for lunch, Von Teo at her house for afternoon exercise. LOL! I gotta spend time with the Lord before anything! :D

I'll upload pics later on la... My schedule is packed with activities and pre-school reopening work to do and I've to find time to compress them...

Till then... Pax et Bonum.

Inner Healing and Transformation Seminar (27-30 November 2008)

I was away for almost 4 days in Bundu Tuhan for the seminar... Last night I was excited to share everything on the blog but was too exhausted to do so... Today I have energy, but after second thought, decided to withhold some because I have yet finished digesting it. And yeah... I'm flying off tonight at 9.05 pm to Senai for a 13-day trip back home. I can't wait to see my parents and the new addition to my family - a male Chihuahua - which we named Kiki!! I shall post his lovely photos here when if I ever get internet access in Kluang... LOL!

Ok, back to the seminar sharing... The food was great, the inputs were heart-opening, the counseling was relieving, the prayer for healing was miraculous, the praying over was joyful. I guess that's my summary... Actually the whole experience was speechless if were to put them in words...

Like Thomas (John 20: 19-31), I had doubted... But Jesus forgives all. I had my share of time to just be with the Lord in Bundu Tuhan, and I really appreciated what He had done in order to prepare me for the future He has in mind for me. I really feel so loved by God and thank God for the chance He had given me. I believed He had yanked all the root causes away from my life, and I've been given the second chance in life by God. It was very painful when we were being led to prayers for healing by the speakers (Uncle Tony Lim, Uncle Joe Chee and Uncle Daniel Kong), but very very relieving once the sins/bondages were being released.

I've discovered so much, some root causes I didn't even remember that it happened in my life, but I just asked God to take it away and I want to forgive whoever who had done it unto me. I still couldn't figure out but I would just let God be God to deal with it.

I've always been drawn to the picture of Divine Mercy (Jesus I trust in You) but I never knew what the picture signifying... After attending the seminar, what I gathered is that Jesus came into our heart and in the darkness His light shines and all the evil spirit run away in fear for Jesus is the light of the world who comes to save. It has connection to the picture of Jesus knocking on the door... The door doesn't have a handle, so it can only be opened from inside... That door signifies the door of our heart, only we can open the door and welcome Jesus to come in to clear the impurities in our heart... If we are willing, He will come. Jesus will continue calling us from the outside until we hear and open for Him to enter. Once He enters into our heart, He will shine His light to save us from damnation. That's the mystery of God... A saving event... Our salvation...

Oh yeah, before I log off for real... I FOUND THE FREEDOM CAMP 2006 CROSS IN BUNDU TUHAN!!!!! I was so shocked when I saw that very cross which brought me to encounter Lifeline Ministry... And so happy, of course!!! Here are some photos of it...

30 Minutes before Stepping onto a Journey of Faith

Excitement is looming in the air. Last night sms-ed Edmond and he was telling me that things are getting kinda excited over there in KL. Somehow, things are also getting excited for me here in KK too. In another half hour or so, Von Koh will be fetching me and we gonna have lunch (that's exciting as well, ok?) then send me to SHC to wait for Uncle Serjius. Brenda and myself will be following him to Bundu Tuhan...

Alright, time to go... Von Koh is on her way... Please pray for me and all others who are attending the retreat... Pray that my heart will be open to what God wants to heal and may I be able to receive the joy and peace of God through the retreat. Amen!

A Visit to the Lok Kawi Wildlife Park with SHC English Choir

Yups... It was a super impromptu trip, initiated by my sifu, Christine and the rest on 24th night. Hehe! I had always wanted to go to the zoo... Somebody should be able to remember what I said and how disappointed I was when I was brought to the entrance of the zoo and deprived of entering it! Hehe! ^_______________^ I'm so happy that I finally got the chance~~ THANKS A LOT, GALS!

Let me briefly summarize the whole trip via photos~~

Dot n me at the entrance... Pinky with pinky... ^^

Jo and me at the pond thingy stated Lok Kawi Wildlife Park (oh well, you know... the kind of pic I'd take when I go to a new location in life~~)

Cutie pose (as usual~~)

The Hawk (kununnya penjaga pintu I think...)

Sleepy Civet...

Clouded Leopard in action... Basically this cat started pacing from the tree bark to its cage when I tried to take a nicer photo of him/her... -_- Cute kitty kitty~~

Doe a deer a female deer... Ray a drop of golden sun... Me a name I call myself, Far a long long way to run... Sew a needle pulling thread, la a note to follow so, Tea I take with jam and bread, it will bring us back to Do-oh-oh-oh... ^^

Elephants, the largest land mammals... Cutie cute cute super cute cute~~

Small is big!

Helping out to fix the umbrella...

Can you spot a deer in the photo?? (Leave in comment please!)

A hornbill sesat on the man-made bridge~

Sleepy sun bear: "(Yawn) Oh~~ Boring! Yet another endless group of crazy humans snapping and flashing and yelling and shouting and jeering at me... I just don't want to talk to them, can't they understand English, my goodness!!!"

Some sort of cow family type of species...

Is that another "species" of the same cow? Try checking out that stones with leaves sticking out from it...

Another species of mammals with long, pointed horns... Kinda cute in fact~~

Jo, Dot and me... On our way somewhere???

Camwhoring at Botanical Garden... Good angle I'd say!~ (HOHOHO!!)

Dot and Jo... Busy~~

Everybody busy~~

Jo and me... Over the other side of the bridge... LOL!

Flying kicks??~ Cool, man~ Jo~~

As usual... SS~~

Exit of Botanical Garden~~

Ponies... Mommy and child~~

Proboscis monkeys (indigenous to Sabah I think...)

Another shot of them... Haha! My digicam no zoom bah~~ :)

"Welcome to my Summer Palace~~ Do you know me? I know you... I'm King Julien~~ Ooh~~ How d'ya know I love taking pictures??~ Ooh~~ I'm so good at this!!!"

Can you spot a tiger?? (You can answer in comment~)

Close-up of another species of deer~

Ostrich looking at us~~

Green snake? Something something viper I think...

I have no idea what's the name... But I'd like to call it a gecko... Anybody who knows what's that, please let me know okie? Thankies...

Two sumandakz at Reptiles House~~

Can you imagine that this is what they have in the Children's Zoo? My only disappointment in the Wildlife Park... Only Rabbits??~ Sigh! Can't they have little lambs and also hamsters??? Even tiger cubs will be nice...

This is Batman trapped in the body of a bat... LOL! Nocturnal creature doesn't seem to care even if I take 100 photos of him/her at different angles if it's during daytime!!!

My Alto Sifu and me

Last photo before leaving the park... ^^;;

Entrance/Exit of Lok Kawi Wildlife Park, Kota Kinabalu, Sabah

Alright, that's all for my report... I shall look forward to see some squels from you all~~ LOL! Basically after that we went home, I managed to stop by Stella Maris blessed sacrament for a few moments of silence with God. In fact, I became so in awe with God the moment I stepped into the wildlife park and started seeing animals in front of me. Seeing how the youngs were being taken care by their mothers... The love that even animals would shower on their offsprings... What more us, as humans, to God? Besides the verse, "Lord I'm amazed by You...", there were 101 things on my mind at that moment. I thank God for all that happened... because I know all occurred for a reason... And I choose to believe He meant business when He broke me into pieces... Business which will prosper me and transform my life into what God calls me to be. Till the day comes... Only one single word I can use... PERSEVERANCE.

At night I drove to Servay after daily mass to buy Tenom coffee (my mom's instruction) to be brought back to Johor next week, and then decided to drop by 1Borneo for some shopping spree. Managed to grab some lovely coloured undergarments at Tune Store, a black, really really formal dress and a working blouse in Niichii. All up to 70% discount. In between that I bought Zane's wedding gift (since I couldn't make it for her wedding due to my scheduled Inner Healing and Transformation Seminar from 27-30 November) and also something for Sislady.

Then I came home and finally bought my air tickets for CNY. Phew! Spent more than RM800 in a day! What a record for myself!!!! The tickets cost me RM500++. I wish AirAsia would be more considerate in increasing the price of the tickets as the time draws near to festive season. As a teacher, I feel the pinch whenever I feel like flying home during school holidays and festive seasons... Ouch!!!

Overall it was an achievement for me to get many things done in a single day. Now what is left is tomorrow - wrapping Zane's wedding gift, meeting Mirina for lunch and an outing with my colleagues in Tanjung Aru... Then it'll be Thursday... Where Brenda and myself will travel with some people to Bundu Tuhan for our retreat... Can't wait to taste and see God on the mountain... I wonder how Elijah felt when he felt the presence of God in the gentle breeze and how Moses felt when he worshipped God at the mountain top that his face glowed until he had to cover with a cloth? I want that experience. I know I will.

Hehe! I shall share about the Prodigal Son in tomorrow's entry...

Till then... God bless us all!