He said that I packaged everything beautifully. Though he meant to say I'm being unrealistic, I saw it and still see it as an affirmation. Life can be both ugly and beautiful. I'm merely trying to be more positive in all the negative things in my life. I have to remember that my temper and emotions are colourful, meaning I have 101 emotions and sometimes I lose the patience of controlling them. When I see things in a more positive angle, though too ideal at times, I'm a happier me. Why not, then?
Life is cruel, but with God, all things become more beautiful. In this season of joyful celebration, we got to realize the cruel-but-filled-with-enormous-love fact that Jesus was born some 2000 years ago to redeem us from sins, and He still does, in year 2009.
Just now as I checked my Facebook, there was a message from a Canadian who has just come to KK as a diving instructor. Being new and looking for friends, somehow I was asked to be a friend - well, it was a "total disaster" for him, I think! He got uncomfortable chatting with me when it comes to God as the center of the topic. In other people's eyes, I'm too "religious" and hard to communicate. In other words, being "stuck up". Perhaps this Canadian guy was looking for a fling with some local girl, that is why it was very uncomfortable to talk about the Creator. It is easy that we profess that we're Christians, but our way of life is no way near to being Christ-like. How many of us here can feel it? I can. I'm no angel, nor am I religious. I'm a sinner, like you guys out there. What made him so uncomfortable with me, then? Because I took the courage to share about God to him. When we're striving to be Christ-like, we're called to be His witnesses. Nope, God never promises us that it will be easy to be Christians, but He promises us that He will be with us as we speak of Him.
I have my fun side, I have my knowledgeable side. It is just a matter of whether one chooses to see me as who they want to see me as. I am blessed to know that many choose to take the path of accepting me for who I am, not who they chose to see me as. And I'm blessed with those who love me for who I am, even I'm imperfect. In God, I become complete. That's what I want to be. That's what I strive to be. I'm still faraway from it, but I know that He will complete me for sure. If you find me somebody hard to speak with, maybe it is because we're of different wavelength. But that doesn't mean I love you less. Or maybe, we choose to see each other in our own eyes, and not with the eyes of God.
I know I'm being transformed daily. About three years ago, my coursemates ever commented that I should "get a life". Well, I did have a life back then, but I was not fulfilled having such peaceful life. Now, I do have a life - no matter how boring it may sound to many of you who are used to something else. Life can be as simple, yet as beautiful as this: To wake up in the morning listening to birds chirpping outside the window, a simple breakfast/brunch of bread with campbell mushroom soup, attending daily mass, shopping for christmas gifts in shopping mall and lastly end the night with fried noodles, mamak style, and a movie at home. Though it sounds like some lonely people, but I know I'm not the only one doing so. Many do that, quietly, and pretending they are alright to others but completely frustrated why they are doing all these all alone, feeling lonely and all. I do what I've just described, and I praise God that I have the opportunity and freedom to do that, and I'm perfectly at ease to know my life is simple, yet wonderful. This is my season of singlehood. Who knows how long this will last before God calls me to another season of my life on earth? So I got to enjoy every minute of my singlehood because He knows what's best for me.
I kinda miss my friend at this moment though... I wonder how is he doing wherever he is?
I hope you who feel as though life has to be more than what you have now to take courage and start living and breathing in the life that you already own. God bless!
"Haven't I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. GOD, your God, is with you every step you take."
~ Joshua 1:9 MSG ~
~ Joshua 1:9 MSG ~
