I bade farewell to Kota Kinabalu yesterday morning. I felt so strange saying goodbye to the land which I called home for the past nine years. It had been a wonderful 9 years there in KK. My church friends are more like family than friends, and I met so many wonderful women of faith in church. These ladies had made a difference in my life, and I'm sure they too will make a difference in all other people whom they will encounter. My choir master and wife, Fred and Gloria, both of them are my friends whom I saw through the times they care for each other enough to start dating, then engaged, next married and now, starting a young family. Throughout these important periods of their lives, I somewhat was there and am there. The Christmas and Easter Choir practices were always my priority and I truly enjoyed the moments spent with them... Then there are Felix and Yvonne, who had been there since I first joined Lifeline Ministry until this moment. Their kindness reflects the love of Christ to the people around them, and I have been honoured to have met them both. Indeed, God is good to all! There are so many people who have touched my life in KK that if I start to recount, it shall go on and on and on.....
Here in KL, I have a wonderful friend who had put me up everytime I visited. She's Jennifer Lau from Lifeline Ministry SFX. Now I'm blogging from her house while checking if my DVD burner and HDD are working before taking off from Malaysia tomorrow. Seems like I haven't found the right program to play DVD on my Windows 7 basic. Besides Jenn, I have Kiwi, who has never failed to meet me up every time I come to KL. He's like one of the nicest guys I've ever met - the way he pampers me and all.. High chance is he doesn't know it, and I doubt he ever reads my blog. Once in a while I still wonder how come he's so nice to me and yet we never thought of wanting a relationship with each other. Yet I know, God has a plan for me which I need to explore His goodness in my life.
It's getting late. Though there are so much which I'd like to share here, but I guess tonight I'd have to rest a bit. There's the morning taxi to catch later, then check-in at KLIA, and finally the flight to Doha. Bidding goodbyes isn't easy.. Just now I said goodbye to Kiwi on the phone and I felt very sad when I think of leaving behind things and people that I'm familiar with... Yet I know His plan is greater than just this...
Please pray for all World Youth Day Pilgrims who will be going to Spain for this event!
Sunday, 7 August 2011
Thursday, 4 August 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 05
My last entry was on Day 14. It's after midnight, and my day 05 is history. An amazing day, I'd say, though my back is sore and I have 60% of stuffs to pack... Let's recount and see what I had done the whole day in the grace of God.
I woke up with a jolt, remembering today was D-day for packing. I never like packing and have always procrastinated as long as I could to pack. I had no choice but to start today because I am flying to KL on Saturday morning and my car has to be sent to the warehouse tomorrow noon. So in the midst of packing, my wonderful insurance agent came by to save my backbone by giving me a massage. It hurt like crazy but I know it's really good for the back. After lunch, I was so sleepy that I could not focus, so I drove out to pick up some stuffs from everywhere, including paying for my contact lens in 1Borneo. After few hours, returned home and started packing while waiting for nightfall.
I finally met Caveman after 7 months. The last time I met him, I just had my hair curled. Now my hair is curled again. I hope it won't take another perming session to meet him. Oh well, it can't be helped if it is so. I'm thankful that he drove all the way from Taman Khidmat to fetch me and then dinner at Sailors' in Grand Millennium. For me, the best part was I genuinely and sincerely felt so loved by God as I shared my journey with him. Half the time I was uneasy and uncertain what would be the right thing for me to say or do. It's kinda weird, really, to actually schedule this appointment about a month prior to this date. He seems fine, more relaxed. I felt judged at one point, but I'm trying my best to brush the feelings aside, recognizing it's not from God. My friendship with him is like a gift from God, and I thank God for everything which came together with this friendship. Haha. Including the anger I felt about certain issue. At least, I've been praying for the past 1 year and 5 months for him about the issue. And I shall pray until things change. I'm sure if things are changing, I will get the wind of it.
After the relaxed-not-so-relaxing dinner, I'm back to the room in Kingfisher and it's time to pack. Yeah, I'm assured in the Lord despite the worries I'm experiencing at the moment, and I'm secured having Him as the Faithful One. Amen to this God of mine.
I pray my last four days in Malaysia will be calm and smooth. In Jesus' name, AMEN.
I woke up with a jolt, remembering today was D-day for packing. I never like packing and have always procrastinated as long as I could to pack. I had no choice but to start today because I am flying to KL on Saturday morning and my car has to be sent to the warehouse tomorrow noon. So in the midst of packing, my wonderful insurance agent came by to save my backbone by giving me a massage. It hurt like crazy but I know it's really good for the back. After lunch, I was so sleepy that I could not focus, so I drove out to pick up some stuffs from everywhere, including paying for my contact lens in 1Borneo. After few hours, returned home and started packing while waiting for nightfall.
I finally met Caveman after 7 months. The last time I met him, I just had my hair curled. Now my hair is curled again. I hope it won't take another perming session to meet him. Oh well, it can't be helped if it is so. I'm thankful that he drove all the way from Taman Khidmat to fetch me and then dinner at Sailors' in Grand Millennium. For me, the best part was I genuinely and sincerely felt so loved by God as I shared my journey with him. Half the time I was uneasy and uncertain what would be the right thing for me to say or do. It's kinda weird, really, to actually schedule this appointment about a month prior to this date. He seems fine, more relaxed. I felt judged at one point, but I'm trying my best to brush the feelings aside, recognizing it's not from God. My friendship with him is like a gift from God, and I thank God for everything which came together with this friendship. Haha. Including the anger I felt about certain issue. At least, I've been praying for the past 1 year and 5 months for him about the issue. And I shall pray until things change. I'm sure if things are changing, I will get the wind of it.
After the relaxed-not-so-relaxing dinner, I'm back to the room in Kingfisher and it's time to pack. Yeah, I'm assured in the Lord despite the worries I'm experiencing at the moment, and I'm secured having Him as the Faithful One. Amen to this God of mine.
I pray my last four days in Malaysia will be calm and smooth. In Jesus' name, AMEN.
Monday, 25 July 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 14
It is finally less than two weeks before I leave Malaysia for two years. I'm still blur at work and very unhappy with the things I observe there. I wish I could do something but there is practically nothing I can do... Yeah, like what the vice principal said, "It's beyond your control". In fact, I am hurt by what he said. The more I tried to do things for the school's well being, the more oppressed I felt as an individual battling against a battalion of soldiers. After being there for almost four years, I find that I did nothing that change the perspectives of my co-workers on the importance to live out the Christian faith in school as an educator. Tonight, I felt embarrassed and disappointed at my lack of achievement to change the lack of empathy in the school. I shall literally shake the dust off my sandals when I leave the staff room. I had tried, though I failed, but at least I know I had done my part. Time to fine-tune my pendulum swings...
I am clear that there have been students whom I had ministered to throughout these years, and seeing them grow, it became a known purpose that what's important is to focus on the calling God has for us all. Just now I had a chat over dinner with Jonathan Tse, another awesome friend, youth pastor, musician and local artiste. Seeing his fervent effort to reach out to the young people, I am encouraged by that, and hope that I can continue answering my call to reach out to the young people of my surroundings as I travel along. Like what my neighbour, Dominic, said when I went over to their place the other night, "NEVER LOSE YOUR FAITH". It's a strong reminder that I should be the difference in the society where Christianity is no longer popular. It's never a shameful thing to be a follower of Christ at young age. I pray I may have the strength to persevere and the power to change the outlook of what Christianity is. I know God has been the pillar of my strength and the divine Provider to my circumstances... Never lose faith... Never lose faith... Never lose faith...
It's indeed hard to say goodbyes. People who have always been around me I will have to bid farewell. I got emotionally when I sent off Karen and Irene in the airport last night for their trip to Europe. It took me by surprise when Irene leisurely mentioned "Don't cry ah", and I cried. Haha. That's the funny part... But I know after this, I won't know when I will return to KK to hang out with her. Gee... Thinking about me brings about another bout of sadness. Time to zoom out from this topic.
It's getting very late now. I better turn in after typing some stuffs on Smart Notebook software for tomorrow's lesson.
Have a good day/night!
I am clear that there have been students whom I had ministered to throughout these years, and seeing them grow, it became a known purpose that what's important is to focus on the calling God has for us all. Just now I had a chat over dinner with Jonathan Tse, another awesome friend, youth pastor, musician and local artiste. Seeing his fervent effort to reach out to the young people, I am encouraged by that, and hope that I can continue answering my call to reach out to the young people of my surroundings as I travel along. Like what my neighbour, Dominic, said when I went over to their place the other night, "NEVER LOSE YOUR FAITH". It's a strong reminder that I should be the difference in the society where Christianity is no longer popular. It's never a shameful thing to be a follower of Christ at young age. I pray I may have the strength to persevere and the power to change the outlook of what Christianity is. I know God has been the pillar of my strength and the divine Provider to my circumstances... Never lose faith... Never lose faith... Never lose faith...
It's indeed hard to say goodbyes. People who have always been around me I will have to bid farewell. I got emotionally when I sent off Karen and Irene in the airport last night for their trip to Europe. It took me by surprise when Irene leisurely mentioned "Don't cry ah", and I cried. Haha. That's the funny part... But I know after this, I won't know when I will return to KK to hang out with her. Gee... Thinking about me brings about another bout of sadness. Time to zoom out from this topic.
It's getting very late now. I better turn in after typing some stuffs on Smart Notebook software for tomorrow's lesson.
Have a good day/night!
Friday, 22 July 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 17
Suddenly, it is less than 3 weeks before I leave. I have another 5 working days and then it is the end of my working life for the time being. Being a student is always both a challenge and leisure. I do hope being far away from my homeland will make me a stronger person. I know I shall enjoy the moments of learning and absorbing knowledge, and also the exploration of Europe herself.
As I move towards the end of July, I find myself with so many unsettled things - transfer of billing and mailing address, unpaid bills, phone package transfer, things to buy and pack, things to bring home and give away... the list goes on and on, and most of them require a sufficient amount of money (which I don't have right now). The smart organization which I am working now decided to pay my salary only on the last day of this month (my original pay date is 22nd of the month). This leaves me broke and stuck without the ability to do anything else this weekend. I guess at the moment, I can only pack my stuffs which are all over the room, and see how it goes.
I know that this challenge I will be able to pass, and God is with me. I can't describe what it means to me at the moment, with so many voices telling me that things are failing and I sometimes am disappointed with things at work etc... but I am certain that my God is a faithful God, even when I am faithless.
So, here I am, done with day 17. With 16 days at hand, many things have to be done. May I be strengthened as I journey through the final two weeks in Malaysia...
As I move towards the end of July, I find myself with so many unsettled things - transfer of billing and mailing address, unpaid bills, phone package transfer, things to buy and pack, things to bring home and give away... the list goes on and on, and most of them require a sufficient amount of money (which I don't have right now). The smart organization which I am working now decided to pay my salary only on the last day of this month (my original pay date is 22nd of the month). This leaves me broke and stuck without the ability to do anything else this weekend. I guess at the moment, I can only pack my stuffs which are all over the room, and see how it goes.
I know that this challenge I will be able to pass, and God is with me. I can't describe what it means to me at the moment, with so many voices telling me that things are failing and I sometimes am disappointed with things at work etc... but I am certain that my God is a faithful God, even when I am faithless.
So, here I am, done with day 17. With 16 days at hand, many things have to be done. May I be strengthened as I journey through the final two weeks in Malaysia...
Saturday, 16 July 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 23
OMGoodness! It's day 23. This also means I have another 3 weeks before I fly to Spain. I had been occupied for the past 12 days, hence the long silence. I'm unsure what occupied my mind, but it's something deeper than I knew. So, I just let it brew for a while, and then when it exploded on Thursday, it was alright and thank God for His faithfulness. I don't know what I'd do without Him, the GUY UP THERE.
This evening I'll be serving the worship for mass for the last time (hopefully not the final time though) with Felix and Praise Team. For six long years I've journeyed with Felix, Yvonne (his wife) and some others - from the time when I joined Freedom Camp in 2006 till now. They have been my friends, my siblings, my spiritual companions, my family. Sometimes we don't talk, sometimes we just let things go on and on without catching up. But they are family to me, sometimes more than my own family is. I'm pretty much emotional and stressed up now, but I know all will be put to the right place, because God is present in our midst, now and always.
We attended Lifeline's M.A.D. Camp last weekend (8th-10th July 2011) in Bundu Tuhan. Thank God for sending Martin Jalleh to minister to all of us there in the mountains. That place is known as "Valley of God" (as translated from the Kadazan word Bundu Tuhan. God is awesome as He always is. I sort of reconciled with my best friend whom I had journeyed with for a year plus as co-cell group leaders. He's like my soul mate who seemed to know me best. Yet, the soul mate who seemed to know me best doesn't know me as well as God can be. My God is THE ONLY God who searches for His sheep and knows them well. I am His sheep and He is my shepherd. Like how David put it in Psalm 23, I shall not want... It's deeper than what we normally can comprehend. It means, having God as my Shepherd, no worldly desires shall bother me, nothing in this world is greater than having God in my life... No soul mates, best friends, etc. can be compared to this God who cares so much that He gave us His son in order that we may have eternal life... (cf. John 3:16).
I was uncomfortable with the fact that there was a hawk who was eyeing on us as I spent time with my best friend. I know some may be insecure with this reconciliation. But why so? I have no time to comprehend the insecurity I sensed, because every minute spent with my best friend counts... Maybe I was insecure too, especially after my best friend told me he not really had missed me throughout the two years of silence between us. Well, I am trying to care not on how he feels, but to work out on my own. Yet I know, we share too many similarities to ignore each other for too long. LOL. That... I thank the Lord, my God.
Day 23 started with long-needed laundry day - there are so many pieces of clothes which require personal attention (a.k.a. hand wash). I have a lunch appointment at Irene's place. She's going to cook wild boar curry. Yummy..... Haha! Mass in the evening, and hopefully can catch a movie together with some friends...
Tomorrow is another traveling day. This time I shall be staying with Karen Chin, one of my kidz from Whispers of Wind cell group in Lifeline two years back... Apparently, WOW doesn't exist anymore.
This evening I'll be serving the worship for mass for the last time (hopefully not the final time though) with Felix and Praise Team. For six long years I've journeyed with Felix, Yvonne (his wife) and some others - from the time when I joined Freedom Camp in 2006 till now. They have been my friends, my siblings, my spiritual companions, my family. Sometimes we don't talk, sometimes we just let things go on and on without catching up. But they are family to me, sometimes more than my own family is. I'm pretty much emotional and stressed up now, but I know all will be put to the right place, because God is present in our midst, now and always.
We attended Lifeline's M.A.D. Camp last weekend (8th-10th July 2011) in Bundu Tuhan. Thank God for sending Martin Jalleh to minister to all of us there in the mountains. That place is known as "Valley of God" (as translated from the Kadazan word Bundu Tuhan. God is awesome as He always is. I sort of reconciled with my best friend whom I had journeyed with for a year plus as co-cell group leaders. He's like my soul mate who seemed to know me best. Yet, the soul mate who seemed to know me best doesn't know me as well as God can be. My God is THE ONLY God who searches for His sheep and knows them well. I am His sheep and He is my shepherd. Like how David put it in Psalm 23, I shall not want... It's deeper than what we normally can comprehend. It means, having God as my Shepherd, no worldly desires shall bother me, nothing in this world is greater than having God in my life... No soul mates, best friends, etc. can be compared to this God who cares so much that He gave us His son in order that we may have eternal life... (cf. John 3:16).
I was uncomfortable with the fact that there was a hawk who was eyeing on us as I spent time with my best friend. I know some may be insecure with this reconciliation. But why so? I have no time to comprehend the insecurity I sensed, because every minute spent with my best friend counts... Maybe I was insecure too, especially after my best friend told me he not really had missed me throughout the two years of silence between us. Well, I am trying to care not on how he feels, but to work out on my own. Yet I know, we share too many similarities to ignore each other for too long. LOL. That... I thank the Lord, my God.
Day 23 started with long-needed laundry day - there are so many pieces of clothes which require personal attention (a.k.a. hand wash). I have a lunch appointment at Irene's place. She's going to cook wild boar curry. Yummy..... Haha! Mass in the evening, and hopefully can catch a movie together with some friends...
Tomorrow is another traveling day. This time I shall be staying with Karen Chin, one of my kidz from Whispers of Wind cell group in Lifeline two years back... Apparently, WOW doesn't exist anymore.
Monday, 4 July 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 35
Today is a day filled with surprises. I am down with flu, finally I'm sick after fighting against it since my last trip to KL. My mom was sick when I visited home during the weekend... Absent from school and wondering how are the teens doing. Really sorry for leaving the form ones on their own for three periods. Furthermore I have caught a cockroach in my bathroom since last Wednesday so that we could do the experiment on the cockroach... I guess I better let it go, or kill it. In fact, I am starving the poor insect underneath a tiny little container now :(
There are 34 days before leaving Malaysia. World Youth Day is 42 days to go... It's very exciting to know so many Malaysians are going, despite the high currency exchange rate that we have to experience. Thank God for all the blessings He's been showering onto me as the time draws near. Receiving the Erasmus Mundus grant itself is a blessing so huge that I see His hand over my life. Even when I lost focus and forgot to "fix my eyes" on Him, He remains faithful and stays with me until I see Him again. What an awesome God I have here!
There are many things which I have to get done. I finally found someone who is willing to house my luggage in Cordoba while I am away for YAI and WYD. Thank God for Maribel (a couchsurfer in Cordoba)! I have been hoping and praying that someone will say YES, and it's definitely grace from God that she agreed to it. I might even have a permanent place to stay for 6 months in her flat which is pretty nearby the university... This is to be discussed when I meet her of course.
I better go to bed now. My nose is rather blocked... Guess I need another day off from work tomorrow...
God bless.
There are 34 days before leaving Malaysia. World Youth Day is 42 days to go... It's very exciting to know so many Malaysians are going, despite the high currency exchange rate that we have to experience. Thank God for all the blessings He's been showering onto me as the time draws near. Receiving the Erasmus Mundus grant itself is a blessing so huge that I see His hand over my life. Even when I lost focus and forgot to "fix my eyes" on Him, He remains faithful and stays with me until I see Him again. What an awesome God I have here!
There are many things which I have to get done. I finally found someone who is willing to house my luggage in Cordoba while I am away for YAI and WYD. Thank God for Maribel (a couchsurfer in Cordoba)! I have been hoping and praying that someone will say YES, and it's definitely grace from God that she agreed to it. I might even have a permanent place to stay for 6 months in her flat which is pretty nearby the university... This is to be discussed when I meet her of course.
I better go to bed now. My nose is rather blocked... Guess I need another day off from work tomorrow...
God bless.
Sunday, 3 July 2011
Europe Countdown: Day 36
Ahh... Day 36 is traveling day. One day in few places at different time. Apologies for not writing for a few days. I was back in my hometown for a short weekend visit. Now I am doing sporadic visits, since I am still working while preparing to leave the country for further studies in Europe. There are many things which I am so thankful and grateful to God and to my friends and family who are so supportive of me. Many too are the things which I cannot reveal too much at the moment.
The frequent traveling is causing me to be rather exhausted and prone to disease. My throat is itchy again. I hope I won't get sick again... I've been getting sick pretty often these days :(
It was a good weekend at home... Food was good, as usual, since I have a mother who cooks awesome food. Then it was the meetup this morning with friends. I like catching up with them. Apologies that I've always been dramatic whenever we meet up. Oh well... I don't come back too often. An hour or two ain't enough actually. Hopefully on 30th July when I go back for another short weekend, I get to spend more time with them...
Time to sleep... Ahh my dry throat!!!
The frequent traveling is causing me to be rather exhausted and prone to disease. My throat is itchy again. I hope I won't get sick again... I've been getting sick pretty often these days :(
It was a good weekend at home... Food was good, as usual, since I have a mother who cooks awesome food. Then it was the meetup this morning with friends. I like catching up with them. Apologies that I've always been dramatic whenever we meet up. Oh well... I don't come back too often. An hour or two ain't enough actually. Hopefully on 30th July when I go back for another short weekend, I get to spend more time with them...
Time to sleep... Ahh my dry throat!!!
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