Trapped in Warfare

Okay....... This is one of the days where I feel trapped everywhere, and everywhere seems to be like distorted and disoriented, especially in school. Besides, it is as though everything I'm doing is becoming more and more meaningless. It has been happening since I came back from school break... When things started to get from bad to worse...

The Devil is indeed working very hard in this battle. And today I feel totally defeated by anger the first thing in the morning. And it continued until this moment. People, please pray for this only private Catholic mission school in whole Sabah which I'm working in now. The warfare is thickening as the day goes by. Many things are happening, not only to me but to all teachers, principal and the school's management. Everyone is affected but many do not understand. What is the effect of having a non-practising Catholic as the head of the school? Will he be transformed? Will he lead the school further and further away from God? Will this school be infested with worms and locusts? Will this school becomes a gathering of demons and evil spirits? Or will this school be filled with sunshines and rainbows soon? What can we do besides praying?

This warfare is worsen as day goes by... The negativity is building up... I need prayers, we all need prayers and intercessions from everybody who is reading this entry today. Just say a prayer for my school, my students, my colleagues and myself... The management of the school needs to start listening and understanding the plight of the teachers and the students instead of listening to craps everywhere. Who would understand the need of the students if not the teachers teaching them in school? Who would understand the need of the teachers if not the fellow teachers? If we're not being protected, are we not being swallowed by the Great Whites? I don't want to see the school eventually suffers the possibility of closing down due to man-made conditions. The school was started as a mission to evangelise to all and bring people closer to God... Are we doing it right?

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.

Mother Mary, pray for us.

St. Michael, pray for us.

All the holy angels and saints, pray for us.

Please be a prayer warrior today and start praying for my school (and maybe yours too). God bless all and thank you in advance for the prayers!

Alpha? Yes, Alpha.

Personally, I think I had posted a pathetic point of view during my last entry. And after a long period of silence, here's what had been happening in my life. Yups... As per image of the entry, Alpha course is what I've been attending rather faithfully for the past few Mondays. This course is organised by the church's Light of Jesus Christ Covenant Community (LJCCC) and I was encouraged by Aunty Agnes Kong to attend the course (on the funny basis that I need not cook on Monday evenings). What really encourages me to continue going week after week is the desire to know more about my own faith and also to go back to the basic. Many-a-times, we tend to forget our basics, the foundation of the church based on the the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, etc. This course is acting as a refreshment for me in order to deepen my relationship with God. And indeed, I hope, it is working out well.

I was in Pace Bene, Papar, for the Alpha weekend away, where we listened to the DVD talk by Nicky Gumbel about the Holy Spirit. I guess the highlight of the whole weekend was the ministry time where we were being prayed over. It was really good and I saw changes, really obvious ones, on some of my fellow group members. The obvious joy that is bubbling inside them was so contagious that spending a few minutes talking to them made me joyful inside too. The mass was celebrated by a hilarious priest, Fr. Eric Jerome. He spoke with such fervent and so much of zeal in him. He used very hilarious and down-to-earth type of examples when it comes to explaining about human relationships and our relationship with God, etc. Not forgetting the hilarious Uncle Patrick from the community who kept telling me that I have four angels with me ever since we first met him during Inner Healing and Transformation Seminar last November (2008). My friend, Irene, told me that Uncle Patrick told her he saw four angels laughing with me after I was being prayed over by Uncle Daniel Kong during the seminar in Bundu Tuhan. And he mentioned he has 10 angels with him. Amen to this uncle!

Of course, I was revealed a specific call to serve during this session. In fact, it was a continuation from the previous seminars and talks and worship sessions I had. The need of intercessors in the ministry seems to have caught up with me. I've spoken to Aunty Lucia, one of the intercessors of the community regarding the recent calls, which I personally would say, made by God through the Holy Spirit during my prayer time, worship sessions, when I was being ministered to. The short sharing with her this morning regarding my dad's condition and then about my question on "the call to be an intercessor" gave me a warm fuzzy feeling. The fuzzy and warm feeling gave me 100% assurance and comfort at the moment she smiled and started telling me how she intercedes for people. Never had I shared so openly about this call, and tonight, I actually felt the need to get it published on my blog.

So far, ever since I stepped down from Lifeline leadership, this is the first time I actually journaled openly about this call to serve. Though still in the midst of discerning and also I still need to speak to certain "authorities" in ministry about this call, I would love those who read my blog to pray for me and with me about this. The more the merrier when it comes to prayers. I'm unsure if I'm ready to share my dear sister's burden on interceding for our ministry, but what Aunty Lucia shared really encourages me to try it out. She told me that the intercessor will pray for the ministry and "transfers" the burdens transferred from the individual/ministry's shoulder to our shoulders to Jesus' shoulders. And then we will feel light and all. In fact, I would conclude from Aunty Lucia's sharing that God is more than happy to take the burdens of ministry from the shoulders of intercessors and intercessors should not take the burdens and keep them on their shoulders. I'm bad at transfering word-by-word message, but I guess this is the gist of it.

Time for me to go back to my pending work. Before leaving, I would really encourage everyone to attend Alpha course in your church (I know that many churches around the world are offering Alpha courses, including in Catholic churches!) because no matter how much we know about our church teachings, Scriptures and we have personal relationship with God and all, it is never too much to listen and understand the very basic facts on Christianity. Furthermore, we won't know when we'll meet a person who might require us to explain the basics to them. Do not fear that Alpha course may take you off from your own ministry. I, for one, still think that I'm called to be committed to the ministry that I'm already in.

Thank You, Lord God, for sending Aunty Agnes and all others to invite me to Alpha. Thank You for opening my eyes to things I've never really seen previously. Thank You, Holy Spirit, for guiding me and slowly revealing to me more and more each day. Thank You, Lord Jesus, for Your willingness to die for us because You love us. AMEN!