I'm missing everything about Kota Kinabalu now... from the food to the people to the availability of Starbucks coffee and Coffee Bean anytime I want. Last night I made dumplings for dinner to satisfy my desire of eating "wo tie", the fried dumpling. Though it's not the Lotus Restaurant standard, but I sorta gotten by with the self-made dumplings. Didn't taste so great when it's fried, but it tasted all right when it's boiled. A success, definitely.

Here's the picture from a crappy phone camera...

I know it looked pretty good right? Haha. I offered some to my Spanish coursemate later and I think he's still alive after consuming them. So, my experiment didn't kill anyone :)

The Fourth Weekend in Cordoba

A month in Cordoba, and the furthest I've been is the Puerte del Romano at the historical side of the city, near where I stay. I have completed one month of not traveling. So once there's money from the scholarship, it's time for me to travel a bit...

Today I want to share a story of wolves in sheepskin. Too often, come to think of that, we see wolves in sheepskin. And we sometimes too become wolves in sheepskin. All these "efforts" are fueled by the need to profit something out of people. The something could be anything: money, relationships, attention, power, etc. The list goes on forever. Sometimes, we don't realize we're being eaten by the wolf until it is too late. Sometimes, when we realize it, we are at the point of death. Yet, when our alarm rings within us and we found ourselves in the mouth of the wolf, the question would be: do we want to fight back and maybe win the battle, or just let the wolf consume our flesh?

I've been in the condition where the wolf consumed me without me knowing. By the time I realized I was already dying. And indeed, it ate the whole me up, killing me softly. Recently, I got to know a wolf in the sheepskin again. I though this she-wolf is a lamb in the first place, all so innocent and seemingly kind. But when I sense kiasu-ness and pretense seeping in, it was rather odd. My continuous observations made me see selfishness and the smartness beneath all the fabricated innocence. It made me nauseous to be in the same space as the she-wolf. Perhaps all the past experiences with another wolf made me more alert about how this species of wolf preyed for it's food, that's why I am highly alert now.

I have always been a loner by nature, given to the family background I have... With only a younger brother, and both parents working, I have learned independence in doing things on my own, play on my own.. That doesn't mean I don't want to depend on others. It's just that I've always been seen as a strong and independent person. When I cried out loud the first time I was eaten by the wolf, everyone left me on my own to lick my wound, not knowing that I died. This time, I know I will not die. I will survive and outlive the she-wolf. It's time for me to refocus and follow the plans God has for me. Sometimes, people's advices are I shouldn't be so strong so that I won't intimidate the men who might want to pursue me. Yet, I believe a strong man who is after God's own heart like David, if God's willing, to pursue me will not want the pretentious me. I am strong not because of myself, but because I am weak and MY GOD IS STRONG.

So, she-wolf, it's payback time.

The Second Weekend in Cordoba

14 days in Cordoba, and I'm not sure what I'm missing of Malaysia. Or maybe seeing and observing others getting connected to their close friends and family members causes me to feel like I'm missing something. I'm waiting for the phone which I purchased together with my new sim card, so there's no credit in my phone as I'm changing my number from Vodafone ES to Yoigo, the mobile operator which most, if not all, my coursemates are using. I don't even know if my phone will arrive on Monday where the change will be official.

No matter how far one can run, one can never run away from oneself. I guess this applies to everyone... So, yeah... run not from ourselves, for there is NO WAY we can outrun our own shadows.

Missing KK, a place I called HOME

It's kinda weird to pen down this entry, but I guess if I don't write it down, this emotion which overwhelms me now will be left unattended and suppressed. I need a change in my life, and this will be the first step to change. Of course, after taking this great leap of faith to come to Europe for a while. Lying flat on my stomach on a queen-sized bed in my room in Cordoba, Spain, my heart flew to KK when I saw the video Fabian Philip uploaded on Facebook. It was a video of our Christmas Choir performance...

I was so touched when the choir group threw me a surprise farewell party before I flew to Europe... Gosh... How I miss them now!! Here's the picture of those who were there for the farewell...

A Conversation with God for Women by Marcia Ford

When I first opened the package, I found the book cover very sweet and the arrangement of the topics very fascinating, though a bit heavy to be brought around with me. I liked the idea that the questions of life for women are being answered in different point-of-views, and in between the lives of holy women were inserted for our reading. I felt the presence of personal touch on my life, and it was easy to go through the topics.

I first read the topics which meant a lot in my life, then left the book for a while before I went through other parts. The overall experience was great and I'd recommend this book to be read by my lady friends. I passed my copy to my friend so that she too can bless others after she reads it.


Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

Max Lucado - Max on Life

I didn't have much time to read the whole book as I was preparing my journey to Europe during the time when I received the book. Going through the book, Max Lucado brings hope to my life by answering important questions which seem menial to people. The book is divided into different sections making it easy for me to find what questions I had on my mind first.

The questions of life are answered in a very systematic and easily understood manner. Multiple sections which cover different areas of life, from finances to the question of God. I would recommend everyone to take a look at this book and dwell in the life which God gives to each of us freely.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

Europe Travel: Day 01

After a combination of 16-hour flight from Malaysia to Spain and a 19-hour transit in Doha, I am finally in the land of our spiritual ancestors - the European missionaries. I am currently in Cordoba, where I will be studying for the next 6 months. Thank God, I met good friends here - Maria Jose and Samuel, and the surgeon friend whom I have not met - Luis Martinez. During my train travel from Madrid to Cordoba, I met Shinook, a friend from Seoul. He was a nice guy and we shared and watched Korean drama together on my laptop. It's good to meet a traveling friend like him.

After 6 hours of bed rest, I feel more ready to take on the journey to Gibraltar. I changed my walking shoes to my faithful Bata slippers. At least my feet are breathing :P Thank God it's summer right now, so I have a less difficult time to adjust to the weather. It's just the humidity part. Cordoba was like an oven until around 9pm last night, but after that, it was all cool and felt so much like Malaysia here. I think I will love European summer most. But then again, I have yet experienced the rest of the seasons.

I wish to share more, but I have a bus to catch at 830 am and there is a 20 minute walk awaiting for me. So I shall get ready now.

My friends, please pray for me safety as I travel and study later on.

God bless :)