The Fourth Weekend in Cordoba

A month in Cordoba, and the furthest I've been is the Puerte del Romano at the historical side of the city, near where I stay. I have completed one month of not traveling. So once there's money from the scholarship, it's time for me to travel a bit...

Today I want to share a story of wolves in sheepskin. Too often, come to think of that, we see wolves in sheepskin. And we sometimes too become wolves in sheepskin. All these "efforts" are fueled by the need to profit something out of people. The something could be anything: money, relationships, attention, power, etc. The list goes on forever. Sometimes, we don't realize we're being eaten by the wolf until it is too late. Sometimes, when we realize it, we are at the point of death. Yet, when our alarm rings within us and we found ourselves in the mouth of the wolf, the question would be: do we want to fight back and maybe win the battle, or just let the wolf consume our flesh?

I've been in the condition where the wolf consumed me without me knowing. By the time I realized I was already dying. And indeed, it ate the whole me up, killing me softly. Recently, I got to know a wolf in the sheepskin again. I though this she-wolf is a lamb in the first place, all so innocent and seemingly kind. But when I sense kiasu-ness and pretense seeping in, it was rather odd. My continuous observations made me see selfishness and the smartness beneath all the fabricated innocence. It made me nauseous to be in the same space as the she-wolf. Perhaps all the past experiences with another wolf made me more alert about how this species of wolf preyed for it's food, that's why I am highly alert now.

I have always been a loner by nature, given to the family background I have... With only a younger brother, and both parents working, I have learned independence in doing things on my own, play on my own.. That doesn't mean I don't want to depend on others. It's just that I've always been seen as a strong and independent person. When I cried out loud the first time I was eaten by the wolf, everyone left me on my own to lick my wound, not knowing that I died. This time, I know I will not die. I will survive and outlive the she-wolf. It's time for me to refocus and follow the plans God has for me. Sometimes, people's advices are I shouldn't be so strong so that I won't intimidate the men who might want to pursue me. Yet, I believe a strong man who is after God's own heart like David, if God's willing, to pursue me will not want the pretentious me. I am strong not because of myself, but because I am weak and MY GOD IS STRONG.

So, she-wolf, it's payback time.