Cloudy Monday

The ability to work from home is a God-given, much-desired type of work, but it takes a great deal of discipline. I, for one, am not someone who is very good with discipline, so instead of working on my dissertation for the past two, three days, I had been roaming around physically and virtually. It is Monday of a typical British summer, which means the sun evades us and hides behind patches of grey clouds. It is as depressing to work at home as to go to the lab and work there. The only difference is at home I get to wear comfortable big T-shirt with shorts, while in lab, I'd be adorned with outside clothes with a lab coat on. Right now, all I want to do is to snuggle under my duvet and sleep. I managed to sleep in late, despite the alarm clock. Ironic indeed!!

My hash browns are heating in the oven while lettuce leaves and tomato are soaked with salt water for a while. Breakfast time today is 10.43 am. Perhaps I should skip lunch. Hmm... I wanted to spend time having lunch with a friend, but yeah, I just remember what E said about setting priorities. I find it hard to follow anyone's instructions or advice recently :( I should try. E had "imparted" the skills imparted by the family & friends. I appreciated E's effort to help.

Anyway, I cancelled it. Maybe this evening or next. Now I could feel myself panicking again after procrastinating the whole weekend. Time to set myself working after breakfast.

Haze and Sowing Discords

It is so easy to sow discord between two individuals of different nationalities, especially when the two nations are facing political/economical/social issues, like right now, between Indonesia and Malaysia. It got worse when these issues are sensitive to the heart of the citizens (of both nations, respectively), but people from other countries used it as a tool of good-natured teasing. These people meant no harm, but honestly, now I begin to be wary of what I would say in front of my Indonesian colleague because she was teased by the Pakistani colleague on the link I shared even if she said she doesn't mind. It was a very embarrassing moment for me when I read the comments which both of them made. I had removed the post from my timeline, and visibility only to them both. I had to do some risk management to avoid misunderstandings between people from my friends' list with the owners of the comments.

Take those Malaysian or Singaporean investors to the court, Indonesia. Like I care if these people have to be punished for doing so. They did something wrong, so they deserve to be punished. But please remember that this happens every year since I was a kid so do remember to do it NEXT YEAR before they start burning your forests again. And those people who are breathing in the dust from the forest fires are innocent people who have nothing to do with your forest fires. So please don't behave as though the whole nations are at fault to your forest fires. Or at least, teach the communicator to the press to say the right things to them.

And oh... If you are afraid of me because of my reactions to some of the things you said, then you may not know me well enough, or never really are interested to know me. My advice is don't judge me when you don't know me. I'm just being me. So if you think you know how to be me, then perhaps you should question yourselves why do you want me to be who you want me to be. And know what, I keep away from such people in my life because it does no good to you or me. I'm not proud of throwing away such people in my life, but it will be healthier if you and me live in our own separate circles. No hard feelings, but yeah, a better way to keep the world harmonious. I learned it the hard way that it is perfectly fine that there will be some individuals whom I can never be friends with no matter how angelic these people are to everyone else around me.

Retail Therapy

These days I've been kinda depressed and stressed out with my masters and everything else in life. One thing which gives comfort is shopping. I know it could go excessive like shopaholic without a tight reign on myself, but some things can still sneak into my room. One real good example is the M&S Per Una mac. Today I've decided to do some eye care shopping, and for toner. I ended up with not just the toner and the eye gel from The Body Shop, but also the seaweed deep cleansing face wash which I had never tried and the all good and reliable matt face mosturiser. And some lip products, which are on super sales. The delipscious sheer lip color was only £2 while the hi-shine lip treatment was £3. The Dreams Unlimited EDP 30ml was £7. I'm a happier girl with these conquests. A total of £35 spent wisely. I never thought I'd like the smell of Dreams Unlimited, but there's the candy-ish, flowery fragrance which I like.

Of course, I spent a little on some other stuffs in Boots, which are travel size for my upcoming trip. I always buy excess when there's sales. Honestly, I see a little of my mother here. But only to a certain extent.

Time to edit some profiles to make up for the time spent on shopping spree. Definitely a happier me now to work with.

Early Morning of a Sunday

A peaceful gloomy British morning indeed. This picture was on Google search overlooking Somerset Levels of England which rightly describes current weather condition in Lincoln. The current temperature in Lincoln according to BBC Weather is 13 degree Celsius!

Not just that, the wind speed is 15 mph (miles per hour, no idea why UK still uses non-metric measurement...)! It means that there is showers with rather high speed wind (faster than us walking on treadmill).

I happily rose from deep sleep at 6.26 am by some fake-out sunlight from my windows. I know many found it weird that I sleep with my curtains open, but I like having natural light shining into my room. This is probably due to oversleeping yesterday. I was probably on 18 hours on-and-off knockout sessions the whole Saturday, with a lame attempt to oversleep on a Saturday morning. So yeah,  I had too much of sleep that my body tells me that it is time to rise up. And so, after a futile attempt to return to sleep, I got up for a cuppa Fatt Choi coffee mix (courtesy of a friend whose stuffs I held hostage for at least 8 months before she came to collect them) and half a can of Heinz baked beans cooked with egg, a slice of cheddar cheese and some black pepper to taste. Hmm... I actually have time for breakfast before getting ready for mass! Perhaps an Activia yogurt? I need to wallop them all before tomorrow anyway :P

I even had read the Sunday readings. An excellent achievement for me, since I hadn't had time to do so since a long time ago, always waking up on time to shower and rush off to mass every Sunday. Today I want to make this Sunday a more interesting one. Perhaps sitting in some nice neat hidden cafe to get some work done? Sounds fair enough. I'll decide if I should haul this big white chunk out from the room in such wintry summer morning.

Did I tell you that officially it is British summer time? Yeah, at 13 degrees! It is officially summer two days ago!!! Yeah... I could still wear some of my lighter winter stuffs if I want to. Right now I'd wear my newly-purchase Marks & Spencer Per Una shower resistant mac, because it is my new add-on to the already stuffed wardrobe!! I paid £49 for a £79 mac, okay maybe it still sounds a bit overpriced for a student, but I really like it so much that I told myself I'd bring it home if it were to be on sales. So when it went on sales, my first instinct was to grab it. It happened so that I was out to buy some last minute stuffs for my Paris trip the morning before I left for London. My account is utterly stretched to the max right now, but yeah, I found out it was "out of stock" online when I returned from Paris and my heart was relieved I didn't miss it.

Enough with the yack. Time to try focusing for 30 minutes before getting ready for mass.

P/S: Sorry for the tiny pics... I want them to fit into my template. I know I could increase the width, but I have to consider that some readers may be using a smaller screen lappy... Honestly, I have no idea how many readers I have, not many but it is fine. Haha!

Blessed Sunday!

New Outlook

After two hours deciding on the design of the blog, plus some tweaks here and there, I am proud to present my new blog design! It may look very conservative, but I prefer to keep it simple for the time being. The photo of daisies at Eiffel Tower for my title design was taken by Edgar, one of the four others whom I traveled with to Paris.

It is time for me to get back to my dissertation stuffs. Till then...

God bless.

On Eiffel Tower, Paris (L-R: Nick, Isabelle, Vivian, myself and Edgar)

Paper, Rock and Scissors

This is written on 1 January 2013 on Tity's blog...

Six months later, she returned to the Lord.

A photo of Tity having a meal at my place a few years back in KK.

This is a tribute to a dear friend who passed away earlier this month which I wrote on Facebook:

On 3rd June 2013, 10.50 am (GMT+8), I lost a great friend.

She fought a good fight all the years I knew her.

My first few years of serving in ministry, she was there with me.

We worshipped, we prayed, we laughed, we cried.

She showed me how living life could be so precious.

She laughed out loud always.

A wise and witty girl she was.

I remembered one night in Sacred Heart Parish Center,

I saw her arm with a needle sticking in it.

She said she sneaked out from the hospital for the night.

Tomorrow morning she had to go back.

I remembered laughing and singing along in her Kelisa,

while she and Egn drove me home.

That was when Kambing Kicik and Kambing Besar came into picture.

How could I forget her supportive sisterly love,

when she accompanied me to confront the someone who hurt me a lot?

And the wise advice she'd give me?

Nothing deterred her from living life to the fullest.

She was an example I gave my students when I was a teacher.

We briefly chatted on WhatsApp ages ago.

The next time I go back to KK,

we would go "jalan-jalan cari makan".

This summer, she will not be there.

But I know she's with Daddy God.

All healed and complete.

No more overnight transfusion.

No more hospitalization.

Now she's with her mom.

Maybe she met my dad too.

In the place where Jesus has prepared for us all.

Till we meet again, my dear sister in Christ,

I will be strong.

I will live my life to the fullest.

I will tell others your story.

A story of faith, hope and love.

You have run and finished the race first.

Say hi to Daddy God and Jesus.

I miss you, Tity.

Safe trip to heaven, sis.

Bye for now. — with Charlene Dawn Toyong.

Blog Design!

Oh my gosh!!

Besides "abandoning" my blog for ages due to multiple reasons, I had failed to upkeep its appearance. It looks HORRIBLE and UGLY. I'd need to "shop" for a new blog design to match a new chapter in life.

Yeah, I'm completing my masters in about 6 weeks, and right now I'm struggling like a fish on the land. (aka very badly).

Spiritual life is practically like searching for an oasis in an uncharted desert ground with not much success, relationship status is still null (friends even suggested me to try Catholic online dating website!!), and dissertation deadline is pushing near, and I'm totally overhauled! :'( I need prayers, guys (whoever who reads my blog). Future uncharted, uncertainties looming. Well-suited for my uglified blog design indeed.

This morning I purposely stayed in bed until like... now (11 am). Even though I had been awake since before 9 am. My plan to sleep in late always fails, anyway.

I've decided to make some changes in my life from now on... TO start with.. the uglified blog design. And I just discovered that I DON'T KNOW WHERE IS MY PAINT APP on WIN8. So far I have not much of complaints about Windows 8, except being unfriendly to the user (me). Haha. Okay, perhaps it is just me not familiarizing with Win8.

Here's how my blog looks like on 22 June 2013, 11.16 am (BST)

And design shopping begins now!!!!! ^________^